I'll eat you up, I love you so.

[on his blessing day, 10/14/2012]

I left for work today after kissing my sweet sleeping baby (who I cuddled in bed for a little bit too long before getting ready) and kissing my husband. I was tired, and feeling the Monday blues of going back to work after the weekend. A few minutes after getting to work, I got a phone call from TJ asking where the baby's binky was. Then he told me the bittersweet news that my son had just giggled for the first time. He's been trying to for a while, but he just had his first real laugh. I'm really sad that I missed it, but I can hardly wait to hear it myself. 

My baby boy is growing up so fast.
[almost 10 weeks old, or a little over 2 months]

[a little less than a month old]

*PS, I'm giving away a cute fall headband on Ali's blog. And she's giving away some awesome stuff too!

tender moments.

It seems that I'm better about documenting the little things, rather than the big moments. I think I'm okay with that.

The other night, I'd had a a long day at work, and I was doing the dishes. Jake was sleeping, and TJ was studying while listening to a piano music station on his laptop. TJ stood and came over to me, asking me to dry my hands. I did, and then he wrapped me in his arms and we started swaying back and forth to the music, dancing there in our kitchen. We smiled and said sweet words, and I thought, This. This is a perfect, beautiful moment.

Last night, after spending a wonderful evening with friends, I came home and woke my baby to feed him. I fed him snuggled up in our bed instead of on the couch as usual. Then, since he'd been sleeping for a few hours, we had about fifteen minutes of awake and happy time. I changed his diaper (his favorite) and tickled him, and kissed him all over. I put him in his pajamas, and then sat on the floor to swaddle him. All the while we were grinning at each other like fools. Once he was wrapped, with pacifier in mouth, I cradled him in my arms, sitting cross legged in my over-sized t-shirt and yoga pants, my hair slipping out of its ponytail. And then I sang to him, like I do every night. I sang to him, and I sang for his daddy who I knew was listening from the living room. And as I sang, I thought, This. This is a perfect, beautiful moment.

I cling to these tender moments. They get me through the long, boring days at a job that I take pride in, but don't love. They get me through them with the promise that someday, not as far off as I think, I will be able to have those beautiful moments all day long, and not just when I put my baby to sleep at night.

two months.

Hey BabyJake!

Well, this last month has been quite the adventure! I went back to work, which hasn't been the easiest transition for you, me, or daddy, but we're working on it and things are getting much better. Jill is your babysitter, and she watches you when daddy is in class or study group. She's mommy's friend and lives right next door. Her two little boys love to have you over too! You and daddy are becoming best buds. He can calm you down quicker than mommy can, that's for sure.

You smile at us all the time now! It is THE best thing in the world. You smile the most when you're getting your diaper changed. Remember how you used hate getting your diaper changed? You would scream at the top of your lungs like we were torturing you. Now, as soon as that onesie gets unsnapped you start grinning like you just won the lottery. You even try to laugh, pushing air out of your mouth and grunting/cooing. The other thing that makes you smile a lot is Daddy. He wiggles his eyebrows and it just sends you into the biggest smiles, which I'm sure would be giggles if you knew how. Sometimes, you even try to imitate him by raising your own eyebrows.

You still have fits of screaming that are still exasperating, but you are getting better. It's worse at night, like always with colicky babies. You're a stubborn kid, just like your daddy. Maybe that's why you're best friends!

We have many nicknames for you. Here are the ones I can think of at the moment:
  • Stinky
  • Mister
  • Mr. Jake
  • Mr. Man
  • Mr. Grumpypants
  • Honey Pie, Sweetie Pie, Honey Buns
  • Sweetheart
  • Beebee
  • Jakester
  • Jakey
  • Homie Dog (Daddy's nickname...it may or may not have a song that goes with it)
  • Pooter
You are so strong, active, and alert. You struggle taking naps during the day...you just want to be awake and involved (and held). You roll over almost every time we put you on your belly. You hold your head up pretty well, too. Jill says that you act like her babies did at 4 months! So, basically, you decided to be a newborn only for a little while.Truth be told, you're big for your age, too. Here are your two month stats from your doctor's appointment last week:

Height: 23.5", 71st percentile
Weight: 13 lbs, 13 oz, 86th percentile
Head Circ: 42 cm, >99th percentile

Your doctor and nurse were so impressed with you and how much you're growing and learning. Dad and I are pretty proud parents. Although, we are sort of anxious for the day that you outgrow this stage of whining/crying and start being able to entertain yourself with toys and such. You're a difficult baby, but we love you so so much. I love watching for bits of your personality as they start to emerge. And that smile... I'm biased (but only sort of)....but I think you're the cutest kid alive. Anyway, I love you baby boy! You've brought so much joy to our family.

love always,

The perfect moment.

Details about this picture:

I'm wearing a hairtie on my wrist, a habit I picked up in high school. My wrist feels naked without one, if my hair is down. I even wore one in our engagement pictures by accident.

TJ is licking Jake's head. I would tell you that this is not a normal occurrence, but that would be a lie.

Jake is smiling. This, I'm happy to say, is becoming a regular thing. The kid can still scream his lungs out, but his smiles melt our hearts constantly.

I love the way that I'm looking at my son, and that this perfectly captures our family element. A little bit sweet, a little bit quirky. I also love what isn't seen: a tired and stressed momma, overwhelmed by the love and support of family and friends.

*More pictures of Jake's blessing to come.

sew much to do.

Well...we're blessing Jake on Sunday. He's almost 2 months old, but this is when it worked + when we were told we could do it. I'm so excited for this special time for our family, and I pray that Jake doesn't fuss through it.

While this special day is really about the blessing of our baby, it is customary that baby gets blessed in a special outfit. I've been thinking about what to dress him in for a long time. If Jake were a girl, this would be a whole lot easier (white dress + headband = done). I'm not one to go for traditional, so I've been scouring Pinterest and the web and racking my brain about what to do. The other day, my mom found a "traditional" blessing outfit for a boy, and I told her to hang on to it for back up, but it really isn't quite my taste.

I was thinking about doing a typical "Sunday" outfit, with pants, tie, and button-up shirt, but TARGET (my fail-safe) doesn't even carry white baby button-ups. That led to more scouring, and asking Facebook friends for ideas. Jake's Auntie Aubrey works at a mall and found one for us (might be too big, but we'll see).

So here I am, two days before the day, and I have a white button-up and a back-up blessing outfit (in Mesa, not here), and I still want to make something else. While browsing my Pinterest feed, I saw something one of my friends pinned:

And I thought, Perfect, no?
And then I thought, I must be crazy.
I am. Anyways, NOW I get to go shopping for a long-sleeved onesie and some bias tape.

But wait, there's more.
I also wanted to make a new skirt for me. I've been wanting to use some fabric I bought months ago, but I was sort of very pregnant, and wanted to wait. What better motivation do I have than a deadline? I'm thinking this skirt:

Wish me luck.
Does anyone know of a chapter of Procrastinators Anonymous that I could join?
Or maybe I should start my own.


Sometimes, God doesn't answer our prayers when we want Him to, or how we'd like them answered.
Sometimes, we have to wait. And wait. And wait.
Our answers might come in bits and pieces, instead of all at once.
They might come in forms we didn't think they would.
And sometimes, we may not recognize those answers right away.

But He does answer prayers. I know that, even when I'm the one waiting.
Oh, how I wait. Even though it is so....difficult.
Almost unbearable.

I guess that's what faith is for, right? Believing He will answer my prayers even when I can't see.

tub time.

Isn't Baby J so cute in his little tub? I mean, look at that belly! I only wish our faucet/sink wasn't so dumb so that I could use this tub and not be scared of my chunky baby getting hurt by the nasty faucet. If you're interested, the Puj Flyte Tub is super compact, made out of soft foam, and fits in any sink (super portable too!). We love it! But hopefully your sink is better than ours.

Jake likes baths...as long as he is constantly doused with warm water. He's like his mama and doesn't like water getting in his face. He's like his dad because he loves having his head rubbed when we wash his hair. We've been trying showers lately and he seems to enjoy them.

*I was selected to be a product tester for the Puj Flyte and received the tub free of charge, but my opinions are completely my own.